27 December 2011

Happy Holidays!

Happy holidays everyone!

It's been such a long time since I wrote... I seem to be saying this almost every time I write now. Except for that one post in September, I haven't wrote for 4 months. Well, to be perfectly honest, I almost gave up this blog... So what made me come back? It was Ladybird's comment a couple of days ago, where she wrote "I miss your blog posts! hope you post again soon!". I was so surprised that someone would still check this place and actually miss what I had been doing. It was very sweet of her to leave me a comment. And here I am, posting once more :)

There are a number of reasons why I've been a away for 4 months and I shall explain a little. I'll try not to make it long and boring!

In August my laptop started acting funny, I couldn't use internet at all. As long as I didn't connect the internet the laptop was just fine, but as soon as I connected it, it would stop working. Whatever. So I was basically away from the net world for 2 months or so. During those 2 months, I would just spend hours reading or writing or thinking or watching dramas on my iPhone. And it does sound boring, but it was actually fine. I realized how much time I had spent on the laptop just checking blogs, websites, emails, facebook and all those things everyone does. And I started to hate myself for losing so much time on useless things. I felt like I had been wasting my life. And I also started hating myself for spending so much money on unnecessary things due to easy net shopping. I felt so guilty for all those things. After that, I read a book that's perfectly normal for most people, I guess, but in my case it changed my life. It was Haruki Murakami's Dance Dance Dance. I am a big Murakami fan, but I had never read this one book, and still a couple others left. I loved it so much, I cannot expressed it by words. Anyways, I can't point exactly what, but something in this book touched me deep. And suddenly my life made sense and I didn't feel hate for myself. (Some people say its one of his least enjoyable works though) I made a decision that what I was looking for was just a simple life that didn't make me feel guilty and hate myself all the time. Then came the big discovery that there is such a concept as simple living. You can search it online if you're curious about it. It's not a religious thing or anything, it's just small steps and ways of doing things in your daily life that make it simpler. That's about it.

After those 2 months my laptop was fixed and I didn't feel any desire to use it, not even to check emails, because I could do that on my iPhone.

In October, at a Halloween party, I met some friends I hadn't seen since summer. They were like "are you OK?", I said I was fine, and they went on "oh, you haven't been using facebook at all for such a long time, we were worried about you. We thought maybe something happen". OK... If they were worried then why didn't they pick up the phone and gave me a call? After that encounter, I slowly started using facebook again and internet in general. Very slowly. Nowadays I use the laptop more often than I intended though, but mostly to watch films or dramas, to write and to listen to music. I spend money on net shopping maybe once, twice tops, a month, which is good. I don't buy things from Japan anymore, I will leave that for when I visit the country again. There's still plenty of Japanese stuff we can find in London. And I've been saving a huge amount of my salary every month for something I have planned. I feel healthier than before.

So that's what has been going on since I left the blog.
Since some people seem to enjoy what I've been doing here, I will continue. There's still plenty to be posted.